Hey folks, as the year ends, I thought I would take a look back. I stole this from a friend's blog (only he used it in 2007, but who cares) and shortened it a lot so we wouldn't both be here forever. So, here's the year in review:
1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
Won the flag football league, volunteered at a homeless clinic, bought a car, snowshoed my first 5K and ran my first 7K, played DDR and Rock Band (SO fun), did 4 14er's in one day, ate a pizza with an egg on it (thanks, Jenni!), drank a boot at the Crescent Moon, went to a Cubs game, and a college football game, and a WPS game, went to Salt Lake, Sacramento, and Minneapolis, rented a car, got published in an academic journal, and all sorts of medical procedure/surgery things that might gross you out but were actually really cool (intubating kids, holding a beating heart during surgery, doing a circumcision, stitching people back up, getting an arterial line in).
2. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Well, I'll list a couple, since following directions has never been my strong suit. Passing Step II of my boards, orchestrating this whole residency interview thing, getting through my Sub-I's and my surgery rotation, and if I had to pick just one, I would say doing so many new things (see above) cause I'm pretty comfortable in my comfort zone and it's a big deal for me to step outside it.
3. What was your biggest failure?
That I still can't wink.
Just kidding.
I really can't, but if we're being serious, I would have to say that I wish I had kept up more on reading for school during all this down time. I know that I needed my elective time, and I've appreciated it, but I could have done much more with it and not stressed myself out too much. Epic failure.
4. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Going to Chicago with Hilary. Everything about it made me really excited-riding the El, Cubs game, WPS game, Chicago dogs, Buckingham Fountain. Everything.
5. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Eating meals with friends. I ate a lot of meals alone. Also praying. Also riding my bike. And I wish I'd cooked more, like real food.
6. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Sitting at my computer doing stupid things. And eating crap.
7. What was your favorite TV program?
If I had to pick only one, Firefly. Hands down. But also, I really like Castle and have gotten really into NCIS. And of course, Bones and The Office are returning favorites.
8. What was the best book you read?
Oh, that is indeed a tough one for me. I really liked Sherlock Holmes and The Book Thief and the Maximum Ride series by James Patterson. I read a ton of other good things, but those would probably be my favorites.
9. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:
I think one big thing I learned was that I regret not doing things much more than doing them, whether it's trying something new, stepping outside my comfort zone, doing those things I've always wanted, or even just calling up a friend--I need to just do it. You'd think it wouldn't have taken me so long.
That's it, kids. I'd love to hear your highlights/lessons learned/favorites of the year. May your 2010 be a year to remember!
Saturday, December 26, 2009
The Most Wonderful Time
What a great Christmas! Because we weren't going out of town, my parents planned all sorts of fun activities and yummy food. Christmas Eve, we did lunch at Maggiano's, which is pretty much one of the best places ever to experience that wonderful Italian-food-family-everyone-together thing. Holy delicious food, Batman! And leftovers!
When we got home, I did my best to whip up a mayonnaise cake, a special goodie that my grandma used to make every Christmas (and usually when we visited in the summer, too). We'd walk in the door, and after dropping our luggage in the bedrooms, the first thing we'd do is head for the mayo cake. "Jannie, I saved you a whole row." Grandma was the only one who ever called my mom that, and mayonnaise cake was pretty much the only type of food that my mom ever ate a whole row of. It's not quite the same as when Grandma used to make it, but it was pretty darn good. And, unlike the banana cream pie that I dropped upside down on the garage floor, we get to enjoy it for a few days.
Mass was perfect. Everyone was there, the youth choir did their songs, and per request (not my request) Fr. Paul made his homily very short. And there was this adorable old man across the aisle that sang along in this super loud, super deep voice (think James Earl Jones).
I'm super excited about my new belgian waffle maker and espresso machine, so if you're in need of a good breakfast sometime soon, come on over!!!
The only bad part is that I can't move my neck because it's cramped up after trying to put together the 1,000-piece Twilight puzzle (whose brilliant idea was it to do that in black and white???).
Hope your Christmases were equally wonderful!
When we got home, I did my best to whip up a mayonnaise cake, a special goodie that my grandma used to make every Christmas (and usually when we visited in the summer, too). We'd walk in the door, and after dropping our luggage in the bedrooms, the first thing we'd do is head for the mayo cake. "Jannie, I saved you a whole row." Grandma was the only one who ever called my mom that, and mayonnaise cake was pretty much the only type of food that my mom ever ate a whole row of. It's not quite the same as when Grandma used to make it, but it was pretty darn good. And, unlike the banana cream pie that I dropped upside down on the garage floor, we get to enjoy it for a few days.
Mass was perfect. Everyone was there, the youth choir did their songs, and per request (not my request) Fr. Paul made his homily very short. And there was this adorable old man across the aisle that sang along in this super loud, super deep voice (think James Earl Jones).
I'm super excited about my new belgian waffle maker and espresso machine, so if you're in need of a good breakfast sometime soon, come on over!!!
The only bad part is that I can't move my neck because it's cramped up after trying to put together the 1,000-piece Twilight puzzle (whose brilliant idea was it to do that in black and white???).
Hope your Christmases were equally wonderful!
Sunday, December 20, 2009
O!
My last interview before the break was in Omaha-a joint program between Creighton, UNMC, and Children's. But let's be honest, the best part of the trip, by far, was seeing Mary and my friends.
We went out to The Matt (Old Mattress Factory) for lunch when I got in. Mary graced us with her presence as a break from studying. (Side note: Sweet potato fries=yum!) By far, the funniest part of lunch came when deciding what to get for dessert (are you surprised?). The Matt has 2 Ted and Wally's flavors of the month to offer as one of their dessert selections, and one this month is aptly titled Quit Your Job and Eat Chocolate. I'll let your imagination take it from there. I was familiar with this flavor, only because Mary had called me-yes, actually called me up on her own-just to tell me about this amazing flavor the first time she had it. So that was high on the running, as was the chocolate mousse. I told Mary to pick one. She gets these big eyes, leans across the table and says, "K, but can we get both?" I leaned across. "No." "K, but can we get both?" There is no reasoning with this girl. And it's hard to turn down the sister I never see, so both it was. Delicious. Back to studying, Mary.
So the next day was my interview. The Chair of Pediatrics at Creighton just happens to be the dad of one of Mary's teammates, who we tailgated with and bonded with at various games over the years. So, I'm sitting in morning report, with all the other applicants, attendings, residents, and Dr. Zach walks in, and when it gets dead silent, he says from the back, "How ya doin', Zappy?" Can you be a teacher's pet at this age?
The ice breaker at lunch was "What is the Christmas present you always wanted but never got?" I said, no offense, Mom and Dad, that many Christmas mornings as a child were spent in mild disappointment, but the one I could remember the most was the giant battery-powered, (child) life-size Army Jeep that never made it into our living room on Chrismtas. One of the residents was "A spoiled only child. I got everything I asked for, including a pony." How tragic.
That night, after a wine-tasting where I forgot my ID and had to watch MJ drink 5 glasses for me and describe them, and after a delicious dinner at the Greek Islands (the restaurant, not the geographic location, unfortunately), MJ, Mary, and I headed out to the Crescent Moon for a boot. If you're near or in or visiting Omaha and have never done this, it is truly a unique experience, best done with more than three people, but whatever. It is 64 oz of German beer served in a giant glass boot, which needs 2 hands to hold. There are a set of rules for drinking the boot, the most basic of which is that the boot must continually be passed around the circle without touching the table. The breaking of any of the rules results in having to take another sip, or buy another boot, depending on the rule. Which may or may not be seen as a deterrent. Case in point--Mary at one point was "tap-dancing" on the table with the boot. "Guess I have to take another sip." Nice. Also, with the reuniting of Therese and Mary, there was abounding laughter as they came up with new ways to "park the car"--ask to see it sometime...possibly is funnier after drinking a boot. That's more than I laughed since Kristi tried to act out "dump".
If the trip didn't have to end with an 8 hour drive through Nebraska and eastern Colorado, it would have been perfect, but overall, a great trip.
Merry Christmas everyone. I hope that the peace and love of God that made itself manifest so many years ago in the manger reigns in your hearts this week.
We went out to The Matt (Old Mattress Factory) for lunch when I got in. Mary graced us with her presence as a break from studying. (Side note: Sweet potato fries=yum!) By far, the funniest part of lunch came when deciding what to get for dessert (are you surprised?). The Matt has 2 Ted and Wally's flavors of the month to offer as one of their dessert selections, and one this month is aptly titled Quit Your Job and Eat Chocolate. I'll let your imagination take it from there. I was familiar with this flavor, only because Mary had called me-yes, actually called me up on her own-just to tell me about this amazing flavor the first time she had it. So that was high on the running, as was the chocolate mousse. I told Mary to pick one. She gets these big eyes, leans across the table and says, "K, but can we get both?" I leaned across. "No." "K, but can we get both?" There is no reasoning with this girl. And it's hard to turn down the sister I never see, so both it was. Delicious. Back to studying, Mary.
So the next day was my interview. The Chair of Pediatrics at Creighton just happens to be the dad of one of Mary's teammates, who we tailgated with and bonded with at various games over the years. So, I'm sitting in morning report, with all the other applicants, attendings, residents, and Dr. Zach walks in, and when it gets dead silent, he says from the back, "How ya doin', Zappy?" Can you be a teacher's pet at this age?
The ice breaker at lunch was "What is the Christmas present you always wanted but never got?" I said, no offense, Mom and Dad, that many Christmas mornings as a child were spent in mild disappointment, but the one I could remember the most was the giant battery-powered, (child) life-size Army Jeep that never made it into our living room on Chrismtas. One of the residents was "A spoiled only child. I got everything I asked for, including a pony." How tragic.
That night, after a wine-tasting where I forgot my ID and had to watch MJ drink 5 glasses for me and describe them, and after a delicious dinner at the Greek Islands (the restaurant, not the geographic location, unfortunately), MJ, Mary, and I headed out to the Crescent Moon for a boot. If you're near or in or visiting Omaha and have never done this, it is truly a unique experience, best done with more than three people, but whatever. It is 64 oz of German beer served in a giant glass boot, which needs 2 hands to hold. There are a set of rules for drinking the boot, the most basic of which is that the boot must continually be passed around the circle without touching the table. The breaking of any of the rules results in having to take another sip, or buy another boot, depending on the rule. Which may or may not be seen as a deterrent. Case in point--Mary at one point was "tap-dancing" on the table with the boot. "Guess I have to take another sip." Nice. Also, with the reuniting of Therese and Mary, there was abounding laughter as they came up with new ways to "park the car"--ask to see it sometime...possibly is funnier after drinking a boot. That's more than I laughed since Kristi tried to act out "dump".
If the trip didn't have to end with an 8 hour drive through Nebraska and eastern Colorado, it would have been perfect, but overall, a great trip.
Merry Christmas everyone. I hope that the peace and love of God that made itself manifest so many years ago in the manger reigns in your hearts this week.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Musings from the dark side
Kelly has spent this week teaching Nutmeg to come when she says, "Accio!" and to play dead with "Avada Kadavra!" Considering Nutmeg previously did not know how to play dead, but only to roll over and wag her tail, this is quite the accomplishment. And it's freakin' hilarious.
This morning I was in the adoration chapel after Mass, which meant that so were 20 other people. While the STM students were totally distractable, they did redeem themselves by repeatedly giving up their seats in the cushiony kneeler chairs for the other adults that came in. Maybe humanity isn't on its way to ruin after all. (For more encouragement, see Chris Stefanic's article in the DCR on culture/NCYC)
Thanks, David, for posting Tom Duckett's latest video. It let me spend a few minutes listening to songs I really miss and reminiscing about wonderful times: singing up the sun, bawling my eyes out, and screaming "So Good to Me" at the top of my lungs.
After my crazy trip last week landed me in 6 cities in 4 days (including layovers), I am super relieved this week to only be visiting one place, even if it means no slot machines in the airport. Plus, I will actually know someone in this city. Always a plus.
Hey, yay Project 600!!!
Hope that your Advent has been a time of preparation and joyful anticipation. There's still time...
Be blessed, or as the Guayaquilians say, Be Saints!
This morning I was in the adoration chapel after Mass, which meant that so were 20 other people. While the STM students were totally distractable, they did redeem themselves by repeatedly giving up their seats in the cushiony kneeler chairs for the other adults that came in. Maybe humanity isn't on its way to ruin after all. (For more encouragement, see Chris Stefanic's article in the DCR on culture/NCYC)
Thanks, David, for posting Tom Duckett's latest video. It let me spend a few minutes listening to songs I really miss and reminiscing about wonderful times: singing up the sun, bawling my eyes out, and screaming "So Good to Me" at the top of my lungs.
After my crazy trip last week landed me in 6 cities in 4 days (including layovers), I am super relieved this week to only be visiting one place, even if it means no slot machines in the airport. Plus, I will actually know someone in this city. Always a plus.
Hey, yay Project 600!!!
Hope that your Advent has been a time of preparation and joyful anticipation. There's still time...
Be blessed, or as the Guayaquilians say, Be Saints!
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
From the Trail
So I'm almost halfway done with this crazy process they call the Interview Trail. I'm learning a lot about what I want in a program--good advocacy, supportive director, forgiving call schedule--and enjoying seeing some new cities. But mostly, it's a huge relief to finally be doing this part of my training, to be scoping out what the next three years of my life will be like, to see residents who are living in the trenches and still smiling, even if they can't keep their eyes open. So, for a whirlwind tour, here's been my last 3 weeks:
Minneapolis--very cold, but not cold enough to keep the program director (PD) from biking to work; popovers for lunch--yay!; Gophers everywhere! Awesome international program, beautiful cities
Phoenix--holy cow, so much warmer than anywhere else I've been; super awesome funny residents that got sent home from kindergarten for being disruptive and get mistaken for nurses daily; AMAZING food, not limited to perfectly cooked salmon and the famous "pizookie" (pizza shaped/sized cookie); great program and great PD--"Work hard. Play hard. Love hard."
Denver--hard to beat that mountain view driving to Denver Health, or Carey's hilarious stories about being an intern ("When are they going to figure out I'm not supposed to be here?!"); pumpkin gelato, enough said. Great education and breadth of experience
Salt Lake--3 teams of Mormon missionaries tried to convert me in Temple Square; saw 120 kids (and kids at heart) sledding in Sugar House; beautiful city and great views, am already planning another visit to see all I didn't get to see
Albuquerque--crazy (in a good way) PD who in response to the question, "Does the pain radiate?" at morning report, replied, "No, we try to stay away from radiation. We don't even own a microwave!"; very supportive environment, supposedly great hiking and awesome food, and lots to see in surrounding areas.
The rest is yet to come...
Minneapolis--very cold, but not cold enough to keep the program director (PD) from biking to work; popovers for lunch--yay!; Gophers everywhere! Awesome international program, beautiful cities
Phoenix--holy cow, so much warmer than anywhere else I've been; super awesome funny residents that got sent home from kindergarten for being disruptive and get mistaken for nurses daily; AMAZING food, not limited to perfectly cooked salmon and the famous "pizookie" (pizza shaped/sized cookie); great program and great PD--"Work hard. Play hard. Love hard."
Denver--hard to beat that mountain view driving to Denver Health, or Carey's hilarious stories about being an intern ("When are they going to figure out I'm not supposed to be here?!"); pumpkin gelato, enough said. Great education and breadth of experience
Salt Lake--3 teams of Mormon missionaries tried to convert me in Temple Square; saw 120 kids (and kids at heart) sledding in Sugar House; beautiful city and great views, am already planning another visit to see all I didn't get to see
Albuquerque--crazy (in a good way) PD who in response to the question, "Does the pain radiate?" at morning report, replied, "No, we try to stay away from radiation. We don't even own a microwave!"; very supportive environment, supposedly great hiking and awesome food, and lots to see in surrounding areas.
The rest is yet to come...
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Give thanks
Things I'm thankful for:
Getting the first interview out of the way
Homemade applesauce, chestnut stuffing, sweet potato souffle, three kinds of pie...yeah, I can't move
A Broncos win
Family all together--the Mary-isms continue to roll
The chance to see my first college football game tomorrow--Go Huskers!
The beginning of Advent (almost)
Not having to go to work tomorrow (or until February)
Seeing everyone I love at Thanksgiving Mass
A warm bed
Good friends to share my blessings with
Getting the first interview out of the way
Homemade applesauce, chestnut stuffing, sweet potato souffle, three kinds of pie...yeah, I can't move
A Broncos win
Family all together--the Mary-isms continue to roll
The chance to see my first college football game tomorrow--Go Huskers!
The beginning of Advent (almost)
Not having to go to work tomorrow (or until February)
Seeing everyone I love at Thanksgiving Mass
A warm bed
Good friends to share my blessings with
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Home Sweet...
Just wanted to share the joys of feeling at home. Shopping for blanket bins and all-purpose flour of my very own. Having someone to share banana pancakes with. Being around the corner from two (count 'em: TWO) libraries. The behemoth total gym in the basement that, at least for now, makes working out interesting. A real live garage to park in. It's amazing how much feeling at home changes things. I'm finding that even the longer commute in the middle of rush hour doesn't stress me out as much when I'm coming home to home. I'm so looking forward to getting all settled in, hanging up my own stuff, hosting my own parties. Visitors welcome.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
To read makes our speaking English good
So, I had 15 minutes to kill yesterday on my way to a meeting, and decided to spend it in one of my most favorite ways to kill time (which sounds so unproductive and frivolous, but it doesn't feel that way): wandering Barnes and Noble. Having just spent a pretty penny on a new car (!), I knew I wasn't going to buy anything, and with only 15 minutes, it's not like I could sit down and, in one sitting, polish off the lastest Maximum Ride book (which is what I did LAST time I was "killing time"). And so I wandered.
I wish I could explain what it is about that store that makes me feel so at home. I think part of the draw is the familiar--seeing books I've read, organized in the same way, with the ever-present Starbucks and comfy chairs--and part of the draw is the unknown--the possibilities of escape and knowledge and characters that you come to know like old friends. I think I could read every minute for the rest of my life, and except for a neck cramp and an occasional need to run around or eat, I would be content.
For as wonderful as wandering is, there is also a sense of almost urgent searching, trying to find the next book. With so many choices and not enough time, where do I start? And so, I've decided to let someone else decide for me. In addition to continuing to page through the classics (Anna Karenina is next), I've decided to google the Pulitzer Prize in the hopes that some of the dirty work will have already been done, and I will be left with nothing less than a list of great possibilities. I also always take suggestions...
I wish I could explain what it is about that store that makes me feel so at home. I think part of the draw is the familiar--seeing books I've read, organized in the same way, with the ever-present Starbucks and comfy chairs--and part of the draw is the unknown--the possibilities of escape and knowledge and characters that you come to know like old friends. I think I could read every minute for the rest of my life, and except for a neck cramp and an occasional need to run around or eat, I would be content.
For as wonderful as wandering is, there is also a sense of almost urgent searching, trying to find the next book. With so many choices and not enough time, where do I start? And so, I've decided to let someone else decide for me. In addition to continuing to page through the classics (Anna Karenina is next), I've decided to google the Pulitzer Prize in the hopes that some of the dirty work will have already been done, and I will be left with nothing less than a list of great possibilities. I also always take suggestions...
Friday, October 16, 2009
The Very Bad, the Somewhat Redeeming, and the Margaritas
Today at work, I'm all gelling in the ENT room, taking tonsils out. Well, I'M not taking them out. That would be ridiculous. That job belongs to a doctor. I'm just the one sliding a metal blade down the kid's throat and putting a plastic tube between his vocal cords so that he can breath while the doctor works. Laura, plus 2.
But our tranquil morning of tonsillectomies was not to be. Around 9:30, we got a call that a trauma was coming in, with a gun shot wound to the face. Let's just set the record straight that whatever you picture when you hear "gun shot wound to the face" is a sure sight less gruesome than the reality. When they got the half dozen rolls of gauze unwrapped from his head, it looked like one of those sick halloween rubber masks had melted in an oven. His nose was buried in the shattered hollow of his face, he'd completely lost one eye, and his chin looked like it had gone through a meat grinder. It's hard to imagine what this guy was thinking when he irreversibly shattered his life like this, but it almost certainly was nothing compared to what he's going to be thinking when he wakes up. I felt guilty that the whole time we were working on him, all I could really think about was whether it was worth it. This guy was requiring a heck of a lot of man-hours, equipment, blood products, etc trying to fix a self-inflicted disaster that he likely didn't want to survive in the first place. The whole thing made me sick because it's so hard to see the dignity in the situation, to imagine who this man was before he landed at Denver Health, and to look for something to hope in for his future.
I don't think I'm calloused that I can brush it off and walk out of the ICU afterwards without looking back. I think it's necessary. I think it is. Trauma has to be like that. You don't have time to invest in a relationship when you have a life on the line. Which, it then stands to reason, is one good reason why I don't want to do trauma.
At any rate, God must have known I needed a break, because I got done early yet again and was blessed with the most beautiful mountain view with all the changing leaves in their full glory lining both sides of the road as I drove home.
And now I have a free Friday night with margaritas and Sandra Bullock awaiting me.
But our tranquil morning of tonsillectomies was not to be. Around 9:30, we got a call that a trauma was coming in, with a gun shot wound to the face. Let's just set the record straight that whatever you picture when you hear "gun shot wound to the face" is a sure sight less gruesome than the reality. When they got the half dozen rolls of gauze unwrapped from his head, it looked like one of those sick halloween rubber masks had melted in an oven. His nose was buried in the shattered hollow of his face, he'd completely lost one eye, and his chin looked like it had gone through a meat grinder. It's hard to imagine what this guy was thinking when he irreversibly shattered his life like this, but it almost certainly was nothing compared to what he's going to be thinking when he wakes up. I felt guilty that the whole time we were working on him, all I could really think about was whether it was worth it. This guy was requiring a heck of a lot of man-hours, equipment, blood products, etc trying to fix a self-inflicted disaster that he likely didn't want to survive in the first place. The whole thing made me sick because it's so hard to see the dignity in the situation, to imagine who this man was before he landed at Denver Health, and to look for something to hope in for his future.
I don't think I'm calloused that I can brush it off and walk out of the ICU afterwards without looking back. I think it's necessary. I think it is. Trauma has to be like that. You don't have time to invest in a relationship when you have a life on the line. Which, it then stands to reason, is one good reason why I don't want to do trauma.
At any rate, God must have known I needed a break, because I got done early yet again and was blessed with the most beautiful mountain view with all the changing leaves in their full glory lining both sides of the road as I drove home.
And now I have a free Friday night with margaritas and Sandra Bullock awaiting me.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Train wreck
Things are not going my way kids.
-Student Health Insurance insists I double cover myself with their stupid insurance and stupid premiums despite the fact that I have perfectly good health insurance on my own, thank you very much.
-No one told me that Denver Health needed two weeks to process my ID badge and access, so I guess I show up Monday with NOTHING and expect them to just let me in to the operating room. Um, okay.
-I somehow temporarily let my brain leave my body and committed to be on team for a big retreat and lead a small group and give a talk on THE SAME WEEKEND that my roommate is getting married and I'm a bridal attendant. Come on, Padre Pio, bring on the bi-location.
Basically, it feels like everything is out of control and I just want to cry. Which is usually an indication that I need to pray. So we're going to do that instead. And yes, when I'm stressed I get to speak in the plural. It makes us feel better.
-Student Health Insurance insists I double cover myself with their stupid insurance and stupid premiums despite the fact that I have perfectly good health insurance on my own, thank you very much.
-No one told me that Denver Health needed two weeks to process my ID badge and access, so I guess I show up Monday with NOTHING and expect them to just let me in to the operating room. Um, okay.
-I somehow temporarily let my brain leave my body and committed to be on team for a big retreat and lead a small group and give a talk on THE SAME WEEKEND that my roommate is getting married and I'm a bridal attendant. Come on, Padre Pio, bring on the bi-location.
Basically, it feels like everything is out of control and I just want to cry. Which is usually an indication that I need to pray. So we're going to do that instead. And yes, when I'm stressed I get to speak in the plural. It makes us feel better.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
This is a high stress situation
Alright, so basically the circus of figuring out where I will spend the next 3 years goes like this.
Step 1. Spend weeks putting together a list of all of your accomplishments, which will be the sole basis on which your merits are judged. Except for that pesky personal statement, which is like trying to sum yourself up in 3 paragraphs. No wait, that's exactly what it is.
Step 2. Hit the "submit" button and pray like mad you didn't have any typos.
Step 3. Compulsively check your email every hour for the next 2 months waiting for a subject line of "Invitation to Interview."
Step 4. Schedule first interview in Milwaukee (technically Wauwatosa. Go ahead, say it..."It's amazing how exotic Wisconsin...isn't." There, I feel better).
Step 5. Try to imagine how I'm going to fit in all these interviews, resident dinners, plane trips, and hotel stays...Do I try to string a bunch together without knowing if I'll even get interviews in nearby states? How close do I cut it when scheduling flights? We are talking about snow season here. Should I rent a car and try to see the city or just stick to the hotel shuttle? Which interviews do I schedule for later because I'm pretty sure I'll be canceling them anyways?
Step 6. Iowa, Utah, Michigan State, New Mexico...
Step 7. To be continued...in a city near you.
So, pray for me, pray for sanity and on-time flights and people to put me up on their couch and for my frequent flier miles to add up quickly and for wrinkle-free shirts and not sticking my foot in my mouth and trying not to let this consume my whole life, because after all, interviews don't even start for another month and a half. Yikes!
Step 1. Spend weeks putting together a list of all of your accomplishments, which will be the sole basis on which your merits are judged. Except for that pesky personal statement, which is like trying to sum yourself up in 3 paragraphs. No wait, that's exactly what it is.
Step 2. Hit the "submit" button and pray like mad you didn't have any typos.
Step 3. Compulsively check your email every hour for the next 2 months waiting for a subject line of "Invitation to Interview."
Step 4. Schedule first interview in Milwaukee (technically Wauwatosa. Go ahead, say it..."It's amazing how exotic Wisconsin...isn't." There, I feel better).
Step 5. Try to imagine how I'm going to fit in all these interviews, resident dinners, plane trips, and hotel stays...Do I try to string a bunch together without knowing if I'll even get interviews in nearby states? How close do I cut it when scheduling flights? We are talking about snow season here. Should I rent a car and try to see the city or just stick to the hotel shuttle? Which interviews do I schedule for later because I'm pretty sure I'll be canceling them anyways?
Step 6. Iowa, Utah, Michigan State, New Mexico...
Step 7. To be continued...in a city near you.
So, pray for me, pray for sanity and on-time flights and people to put me up on their couch and for my frequent flier miles to add up quickly and for wrinkle-free shirts and not sticking my foot in my mouth and trying not to let this consume my whole life, because after all, interviews don't even start for another month and a half. Yikes!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
I'm Awesome
I would just like to say that, although the Red Stars had a tough second half and missed the playoffs, and although St. Louis surprised me, and even though LA Sol led the whole season and Sky Blue had to pull off some upsets, I totally called it!
Saturday, August 15, 2009
More than a mere aversion
The DSM IV defines a specific phobia as a
A. Marked and persistent fear that is excessive or unreasonable.
B. Exposure to the phobic stimulus almost invariably provokes an immediate anxiety response.
C. The person recognizes that the fear is excessive or unreasonable.
D. The phobic situation(s) is avoided or else is endured with intense anxiety or distress.
E. The avoidance, anxious anticipation, or distress in the feared situation(s) interferes significantly with the person's normal functioning.
F. In individuals under age 18 years, the duration is at least 6 months.
...and as with all DSM IV disorders...
G. The anxiety, Panic Attacks, or phobic avoidance associated with the specific object or situation are not better accounted for by another mental disorder.
I just want to make it clear for the following story that according to bonafide scientific definition, I have clinical arachnophobia, as I think you will see. And I kind of take offense when people are like "Oh, yeah, I'm arachnophobic" and then can sit calmly with a spider in the same city block. I'm sorry, friends, but you mock the dysfuction of us true phobics by pretending.
Now, I'm going to but mention the actual spider, because it will give me nightmares (again), but I'm pretty sure you will enjoy the retelling of our reaction to it.
Last night, we were wishing Hilary off after watching Kyle Orton self destruct, I was returning something to the basement, and on my way up the stairs, I saw a HUGE spider on the stairs. Now, I realize that I tend to exaggerate when it comes to this specific subject, usually on the order of ten-fold, but this one really was HUGE. I'm pretty sure I had taken three stairs in one giant leap by the time an inhuman "Uh-wah-uhhhhhh-ahhhhh" made it out of my mouth. Michelle, a fellow arachnophobe, understood immediately, and goes, "You have to KILL it!" with the unspoken (actually, later she did speak it) assumption that if left alive, the spider would stalk her to her bedroom, kill, and eat her in the middle of the night. And I'm like, "Oh, okay, did that 'uh-wah-uhhhhhh-ahhhh' SOUND like someone who is going to go BACK THERE, ANYWHERE NEAR that thing? Didn't THINK so." So she's like, "Well, then get someone to kill it." So, grown-up, mature, nearly doctor that I am, I screamed, "MOMMY!!!!!!"
Unfortunately, running away crying like a baby means that said spider has the chance to hide by the time my valiant pajama-clad mother got down there with three papertowels ("Um, you might need the whole roll") and the can of Raid. So we looked for a while, covered basically the whole doorway and Michelle's bathroom (in case it DID come stalking her) in the sweet scent of Raid, and went back to....
"Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Um, yeah. IT. CAME. BACK. Now about 5 stairs closer to MY BEDROOM. NOT OKAY. This time, we were smart enough to leave one of us cowering in the stairwell so it couldn't escape again (not me, I was the one on the other side of the house grasping handfuls of my shorts to keep myself from going through the wall) while my mom recovered her weapons. Unfortunately, she didn't have her glasses on, so Michelle had to get a flashlight to shine on the spider. Which meant she actually had to LOOK at it. See where this is going? Not what I'd call an effective spotlight. Nonetheless, my mom triumphed against her menacing foe, turning towards us with the papertowel wad, saying, "Let's see if I got him." "NOOOOOOO!!!!" More running away grabbing my shorts.
Wish I could say this was the end of the story, but apparently Michelle wasn't quite liberal enough with the Raid, because there were two more waiting for her when she went to brush her teeth. "MOM!!!! WE NEED YOU AGAIN!" Thank God for understanding parents. I'll even accept the ridicule that comes along with it, as long as they kill the devil monsters. After all, I KNOW it's a perfectly irrational fear (see A and C above) and that going out of my way to avoid spiders (D) interferes with normal function (E) and I'm not exactly PROUD of the girlish screams that accompany my severe anxiety (B) but I CAN'T HELP IT.
I'm just glad that it provides so much amusement for everyone else.
And let's just pray I end up with a VERY understanding husband.
A. Marked and persistent fear that is excessive or unreasonable.
B. Exposure to the phobic stimulus almost invariably provokes an immediate anxiety response.
C. The person recognizes that the fear is excessive or unreasonable.
D. The phobic situation(s) is avoided or else is endured with intense anxiety or distress.
E. The avoidance, anxious anticipation, or distress in the feared situation(s) interferes significantly with the person's normal functioning.
F. In individuals under age 18 years, the duration is at least 6 months.
...and as with all DSM IV disorders...
G. The anxiety, Panic Attacks, or phobic avoidance associated with the specific object or situation are not better accounted for by another mental disorder.
I just want to make it clear for the following story that according to bonafide scientific definition, I have clinical arachnophobia, as I think you will see. And I kind of take offense when people are like "Oh, yeah, I'm arachnophobic" and then can sit calmly with a spider in the same city block. I'm sorry, friends, but you mock the dysfuction of us true phobics by pretending.
Now, I'm going to but mention the actual spider, because it will give me nightmares (again), but I'm pretty sure you will enjoy the retelling of our reaction to it.
Last night, we were wishing Hilary off after watching Kyle Orton self destruct, I was returning something to the basement, and on my way up the stairs, I saw a HUGE spider on the stairs. Now, I realize that I tend to exaggerate when it comes to this specific subject, usually on the order of ten-fold, but this one really was HUGE. I'm pretty sure I had taken three stairs in one giant leap by the time an inhuman "Uh-wah-uhhhhhh-ahhhhh" made it out of my mouth. Michelle, a fellow arachnophobe, understood immediately, and goes, "You have to KILL it!" with the unspoken (actually, later she did speak it) assumption that if left alive, the spider would stalk her to her bedroom, kill, and eat her in the middle of the night. And I'm like, "Oh, okay, did that 'uh-wah-uhhhhhh-ahhhh' SOUND like someone who is going to go BACK THERE, ANYWHERE NEAR that thing? Didn't THINK so." So she's like, "Well, then get someone to kill it." So, grown-up, mature, nearly doctor that I am, I screamed, "MOMMY!!!!!!"
Unfortunately, running away crying like a baby means that said spider has the chance to hide by the time my valiant pajama-clad mother got down there with three papertowels ("Um, you might need the whole roll") and the can of Raid. So we looked for a while, covered basically the whole doorway and Michelle's bathroom (in case it DID come stalking her) in the sweet scent of Raid, and went back to....
"Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Um, yeah. IT. CAME. BACK. Now about 5 stairs closer to MY BEDROOM. NOT OKAY. This time, we were smart enough to leave one of us cowering in the stairwell so it couldn't escape again (not me, I was the one on the other side of the house grasping handfuls of my shorts to keep myself from going through the wall) while my mom recovered her weapons. Unfortunately, she didn't have her glasses on, so Michelle had to get a flashlight to shine on the spider. Which meant she actually had to LOOK at it. See where this is going? Not what I'd call an effective spotlight. Nonetheless, my mom triumphed against her menacing foe, turning towards us with the papertowel wad, saying, "Let's see if I got him." "NOOOOOOO!!!!" More running away grabbing my shorts.
Wish I could say this was the end of the story, but apparently Michelle wasn't quite liberal enough with the Raid, because there were two more waiting for her when she went to brush her teeth. "MOM!!!! WE NEED YOU AGAIN!" Thank God for understanding parents. I'll even accept the ridicule that comes along with it, as long as they kill the devil monsters. After all, I KNOW it's a perfectly irrational fear (see A and C above) and that going out of my way to avoid spiders (D) interferes with normal function (E) and I'm not exactly PROUD of the girlish screams that accompany my severe anxiety (B) but I CAN'T HELP IT.
I'm just glad that it provides so much amusement for everyone else.
And let's just pray I end up with a VERY understanding husband.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
I make my husband put down his job, so I don't have to tell them I work at Children's
If you want to be encouraged about your kids turning out okay, are pregnant, or really ever planning to have kids, NEVER have a neonatologist tell you stories. They will ALL sound like horror stories to the uninitiated (read: non-medical professionals). To us, they are hilarious.
Like your son getting bitten by a pit viper and sucked on by a leech in the span of 24 hours. "He says the snake bit him and THEN he threw a metal stick at it...but anyone who knows Kieran knows it was probably the other way around. I tried calling poison control, and the operator was like, 'Oh, they're closed.'"
Or delivering a baby and having him turn blue and start snorting within minutes. "I just said, 'He's fine, he just needs to acclimate a little bit.'" "And they LISTENED to you?" "Well, she didn't take a lot of convincing. And I knew they were just going to whisk him away to the NICU and poke him and put him on CPAP, and at the time, it sounded like a good idea. I don't know, I was so drugged up I couldn't stay awake."
Or any number of things that land you on a first name basis with the urgent care docs and the overpowering desire to hide the fact that you are a DOCTOR to the nurses in the emergency room. "My husband made me bring her in. Next time, he's putting HIS job on there, cause you know as soon as you leave, they're talking about you."
And those are just the neonatologists' kids.
Also what I've learned is that if someone codes (heart stops beating or they stop breathing), the phones and overhead pages may or MAY NOT tell you what is going on and might lead to a slight delay in qualified people responding; but if a parent brings in Scotcharoos to the break room, it only takes 37.4 seconds for everyone on the floor to know that they're there. Same thing with free ice cream day. Priorities, people.
Like your son getting bitten by a pit viper and sucked on by a leech in the span of 24 hours. "He says the snake bit him and THEN he threw a metal stick at it...but anyone who knows Kieran knows it was probably the other way around. I tried calling poison control, and the operator was like, 'Oh, they're closed.'"
Or delivering a baby and having him turn blue and start snorting within minutes. "I just said, 'He's fine, he just needs to acclimate a little bit.'" "And they LISTENED to you?" "Well, she didn't take a lot of convincing. And I knew they were just going to whisk him away to the NICU and poke him and put him on CPAP, and at the time, it sounded like a good idea. I don't know, I was so drugged up I couldn't stay awake."
Or any number of things that land you on a first name basis with the urgent care docs and the overpowering desire to hide the fact that you are a DOCTOR to the nurses in the emergency room. "My husband made me bring her in. Next time, he's putting HIS job on there, cause you know as soon as you leave, they're talking about you."
And those are just the neonatologists' kids.
Also what I've learned is that if someone codes (heart stops beating or they stop breathing), the phones and overhead pages may or MAY NOT tell you what is going on and might lead to a slight delay in qualified people responding; but if a parent brings in Scotcharoos to the break room, it only takes 37.4 seconds for everyone on the floor to know that they're there. Same thing with free ice cream day. Priorities, people.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
The Big City
Just got back from 5 days in Chicago, to take my boards, but mostly to take a vacation. It was my first real foray into public transportation (World Youth Day in Toronto didn't really count, because there were 60 of us and it was free with registration, so we were just herded around and tried to always be with an adult) and except for one brief episode of wandering Saturday night, we successfully navigated the El, the buses, and even hailed our first taxi. Laura and Hilary, plus one. Although, I have to say, getting back into my own car, on familiar roads, without the incessant honking and hundreds of pedestrians was a welcome change.
Cubs fans are awesome. We went to the game on Saturday and got to experience the whole of Wrigley Field, Chicago dogs, and Cubs mania. I told Hilary that I never even stood up and cheered that much at a Rockies game. It must be infectious. And with thousands of people sticking around after the game to sing "Go Cubs go-o-o", how can it not be? As we tried to take a self-portrait of us with the field behind us, we had multiple people grab the camera and offer to take the picture for us. And all afternoon/evening/night, people saw our Cubs gear and stopped us on the street: "Cubs win?" "Go Cubs" and the occasional instigating "Go Sox." Even at Mass, during the sign of peace, Hilary got a "God bless you. Go Cubs." On our way out of the stadium, we passed Mullen's Bar and went in to see if they had t-shirts. Not only did they, but the bartender bought Hilary a beer as she pointed out her last name on the credit card. Hooray.
We got to see a heck of a lot of Chicago. Magnificent Mile, Navy Pier, Millenium Park, Buckingham Fountain, Soldier Field, Hyde Park, Lake Michigan, the River Walk. Danced to one of the saxophone players on the street, hit up a White Castle, and one of the dozens of Baskin Robbins for late night ice cream, chatted with cops and bus drivers and random people on the street, and got to watch Abby Wambach score two goals against the Red Stars.
I maintain the fact that I don't think I could live in Chicago, what with the commuting and the amount of people, but it's a great place to visit.
Cubs fans are awesome. We went to the game on Saturday and got to experience the whole of Wrigley Field, Chicago dogs, and Cubs mania. I told Hilary that I never even stood up and cheered that much at a Rockies game. It must be infectious. And with thousands of people sticking around after the game to sing "Go Cubs go-o-o", how can it not be? As we tried to take a self-portrait of us with the field behind us, we had multiple people grab the camera and offer to take the picture for us. And all afternoon/evening/night, people saw our Cubs gear and stopped us on the street: "Cubs win?" "Go Cubs" and the occasional instigating "Go Sox." Even at Mass, during the sign of peace, Hilary got a "God bless you. Go Cubs." On our way out of the stadium, we passed Mullen's Bar and went in to see if they had t-shirts. Not only did they, but the bartender bought Hilary a beer as she pointed out her last name on the credit card. Hooray.
We got to see a heck of a lot of Chicago. Magnificent Mile, Navy Pier, Millenium Park, Buckingham Fountain, Soldier Field, Hyde Park, Lake Michigan, the River Walk. Danced to one of the saxophone players on the street, hit up a White Castle, and one of the dozens of Baskin Robbins for late night ice cream, chatted with cops and bus drivers and random people on the street, and got to watch Abby Wambach score two goals against the Red Stars.
I maintain the fact that I don't think I could live in Chicago, what with the commuting and the amount of people, but it's a great place to visit.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Milestones
Congrats to Abby Wambach for her 100th career international goal (And Heather Mitts for her 100th cap), joining the ranks of Mia Hamm (who, incidentally also scored her 100th in Rochester), Kristine Lilly, Michelle Akers, and Tiffany Milbrett. Supported by family and friends in her hometown, she had multiple chances throughout the match, as her teammates did their best to help her knock one in. "I don't think they were passing it to anyone else."
Although I actually missed seeing the goal, being the lone member of my family able to cheer on the youngest Zapapi in softball greatness this afternoon, I did enjoy screaming my way through the first half, enjoying the chance to shout "HAO", watch Julie Foudy be the only respectable women commentator on ESPN, or at all for that matter, and see Abby muscle her way through the box. I told my friend Lisa, "You remind me of Abby Wambach, if you were 5'11" and a beast." She wasn't quite sure if it was a compliment or not. It was. Or at least neutral; they just look alike. Also got me REAL excited to see all the stars in person in a week. Prepare for some major yelling.
And watch the next friendly, Wednesday 8 pm EST, on Fox Soccer Channel (or via Match Tracker on ussoccer.com)
Monday, July 13, 2009
God Lives Here
Reasons I love Colorado (in no particular order, and by no means comprehensive, especially since I really need to get back to studying):
-view from the top of the mountain--there is absolutely nothing like this in the world
-best state flower. Hands down.
-coffee shops with signs on the door saying "please take your crampons off before coming inside"
-people in the parades throw dog biscuits in addition to candy
-the "Hey Baby" song at the Rockies games
-all the parks, and the people who use them
-It goes without saying, but 300 days of sunshine...please.
-Fittest state in the nation, many years running
-a large percentage of my favorite people live here
-Bonnie Brae ice cream
-our patron is St. Francis of Assisi
-KYGO
-The Children's Hospital (I mean, seriously, if I didn't have high hopes of staying here for residency and loving it, it would put a serious damper on things)
-apparently home of the best "Small Town in America" (Louisville)
-home of Chipotle.
-Breckenridge Brewery, New Belgium, Boulder Beer, Great Divide--most breweries per capita of any state--means you can always find a good microbrew on tap
feel free to add your own...
-view from the top of the mountain--there is absolutely nothing like this in the world-best state flower. Hands down.
-coffee shops with signs on the door saying "please take your crampons off before coming inside"
-people in the parades throw dog biscuits in addition to candy
-the "Hey Baby" song at the Rockies games
-all the parks, and the people who use them
-It goes without saying, but 300 days of sunshine...please.
-Fittest state in the nation, many years running
-a large percentage of my favorite people live here
-Bonnie Brae ice cream
-our patron is St. Francis of Assisi
-KYGO
-The Children's Hospital (I mean, seriously, if I didn't have high hopes of staying here for residency and loving it, it would put a serious damper on things)
-apparently home of the best "Small Town in America" (Louisville)
-home of Chipotle.
-Breckenridge Brewery, New Belgium, Boulder Beer, Great Divide--most breweries per capita of any state--means you can always find a good microbrew on tap
feel free to add your own...
Friday, July 3, 2009
Do you like reggae?
All's right with the world. Survived my Sub-I. The whole family together, stuffing my face with Buttermilk Spice muffins, a Colorado sunset, and Firefly. Plus I get one more day of slacking off before studying kicks me in the head. "Knee to the head! Knee to the head! Knee to the head!" So, for the next 3 weeks, plan on not seeing me. Plan on me studying. Maybe if enough people think good thoughts, it will actually happen. Only 2993 practice questions to go.
And 9100 situps. Laura, Jon, Eric, and I are doing the 10,000 Challenge. That many situps (crunches, reverse crunches, any kind of abdominal contraction, besides labor really) in the month of July. So pretty much by the end of the month, my brain and my belly will be exhausted but tuned up, and the rest of me...well, whatever. With 150 practice questions and 333 situps a day, who has time to do anything else?
And 9100 situps. Laura, Jon, Eric, and I are doing the 10,000 Challenge. That many situps (crunches, reverse crunches, any kind of abdominal contraction, besides labor really) in the month of July. So pretty much by the end of the month, my brain and my belly will be exhausted but tuned up, and the rest of me...well, whatever. With 150 practice questions and 333 situps a day, who has time to do anything else?
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Oh nothing, I just wanted to be sure of you
Nothing much to say, except I'm still alive, not like anyone who reads this doesn't already talk to me twice a week anyways, but I thought I would post before I got to the point where even those three people stopped checking to see if I updated because I never did.
Here's what new in my life, in no particular order.
-I made brownies.
-I got my third parking ticket of the year (I hate street sweepers).
-I did my first (and second) overnight calls.
-I went to my first code (where someone is "found down" and you have to do CPR...he made it through but died later that day).
-I'm stressed about not having enough time to study for boards. Whose idea was it to base my entire schedule off of a soccer game?
-I haven't made pancakes in a long time (tomorrow's the day...mmm strawberry pancakes).
-I really like my Marian group; they're great.
-Went to the Greek Festival and ate flaming cheese and decided there will be Greek dancing at my wedding (to which announcement a person who didn't know me was about to congratulate me on my recent engagement until she was informed I just plan random things about my wedding without having any prospects on the horizon).
-My medicine attending agreed to write a rec letter, even though we both know pediatric letters are better.
-I spoke up during ICU rounds today and was (mostly) correct. I hope someone was paying attention.
-I bought cage-free eggs cause I saw what the caged chickens go through, and it was enough to at least alter one purchase.
-Bought my dad a funny father's day card. Still haven't given Hilary her birthday present.
-Sat in a hot tub.
-Ate corn on the cob.
Isn't my life thrilling? Aren't you glad you checked to see if I posted anything new?
Here's what new in my life, in no particular order.
-I made brownies.
-I got my third parking ticket of the year (I hate street sweepers).
-I did my first (and second) overnight calls.
-I went to my first code (where someone is "found down" and you have to do CPR...he made it through but died later that day).
-I'm stressed about not having enough time to study for boards. Whose idea was it to base my entire schedule off of a soccer game?
-I haven't made pancakes in a long time (tomorrow's the day...mmm strawberry pancakes).
-I really like my Marian group; they're great.
-Went to the Greek Festival and ate flaming cheese and decided there will be Greek dancing at my wedding (to which announcement a person who didn't know me was about to congratulate me on my recent engagement until she was informed I just plan random things about my wedding without having any prospects on the horizon).
-My medicine attending agreed to write a rec letter, even though we both know pediatric letters are better.
-I spoke up during ICU rounds today and was (mostly) correct. I hope someone was paying attention.
-I bought cage-free eggs cause I saw what the caged chickens go through, and it was enough to at least alter one purchase.
-Bought my dad a funny father's day card. Still haven't given Hilary her birthday present.
-Sat in a hot tub.
-Ate corn on the cob.
Isn't my life thrilling? Aren't you glad you checked to see if I posted anything new?
Monday, June 1, 2009
Hiding under the bed, figuratively speaking.
So, if you've seen or read "Marley and Me", you know that our canine counterparts can be just as neurotic and crazy as their owners. My roommate's dog, Ruben, is normally a "ferocious" watchdog, barking at anything that moves, and many things that don't. But flash lightening outside the house or let one thunderclap rip within earshot, and he turns into a raging scaredy-cat. Last night, with the lightening surrounding the house, he became my shadow, practically knocking me over as he followed me around, into the kitchen, into my room (both places he's normally not allowed), and then, to my surprise, right into the bathroom, where, feeling sorry for him, I let him keep me company while I brushed my teeth and got ready for bed. Then he was just about to lay himself down in my closet to weather the storm when Laura came out of her room and he found a new person to follow. At least he doesn't eat the dry wall. I, on the other hand, loved the storm, especially the fresh air it gave us this morning. Yay.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
First Mass
I had the opportunity to go to Fr. Mauricio Bermudez's first Mass on Sunday, and let me just say that if you ever have the chance to go to a First Mass, TAKE IT! It was beautiful. Not only the incense and the glowing white garments and the bilingual Mass (which was awesome). But also very surreal to think over how he had not been a priest the previous morning, and now he is. How he can now consecrate the Eucharist, be in persona Christi, celebrate the sacraments. It's beautiful and mystical. And so touching to witness his own emotion and tears as he prayed the Eucharistic prayer, reliving the sacrifice of the Last Supper and realizing that he was participating in, even being the vehicle for, a miracle. Next year, three more seminarians that I know will be ordained, and I'm excited to see that as well. Keep praying for Fr. Mau, and for all those in formation, and for good men to fulfill their vocation, whatever it may be.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Hey baby
So I was dragging Reuben along this morning (literally) and saw like five geese waddling rapidly (can you do that?) out of the way, and as they parted, there were, not one, but TWO BABY GEESE! Little yellow fluff balls that remind me of kindergarten where we all got to hold baby chicks (or maybe geese...they look very similar) and they peed all over everything and the little straw cages smelled disgusting, but it was okay cause they're cute. Kind of like little kids. I was at the park on Tuesday with Elise, who was babysitting, and I was feeding Ben macaroni and cheese and he pulled a piece out of his mouth, rubbed it on my face, and stuck it on my shirt. Gross? No. Cute! See, now you're getting the picture. I mean, you can't look at this kid's face and not melt. He could probably destroy the world and I would still want to hold him forever.
Friday, May 8, 2009
First responder
I was on my way to class this morning, annoyed that the inability to put the crossword puzzle down had made me late, and annoyed that the cars in front of me had blocked off the side street so the west-bound car couldn't turn. So the light turns green, the cars start moving, the biker I had just passed is coming up to the side street, the car in front of me waves the turning car on through...right into the biker. (Just picture badness, I hate trying to describe accidents with words; that's why incident reports have pictures on them)
For a second I hoped that the cyclist somehow swerved, but when I saw the wheel flip up into the air, well, that's when my sympathetic nervous system kicked in. Were I a swearing person, I'm pretty sure a choice word would have escaped my mouth. Instead, my thoughts were, "Well, this is what you're training for, GET OUT OF THE FREAKING CAR!" I was so glad 3 of my classmates also stopped, because it was way less nerve-wracking that way. So I get out of the car and the first thing I do is make sure someone's already got a dispatcher on the phone (I mean, really, the first step is to call for help). So then there's this poor girl just lying sprawled in the road, neighbors in their pajamas saying "Don't move." Meanwhile, "ABCs! ABCs! ABCs!" kept running through my head, but she was talking and breathing just fine, and when the answer isn't "rapid sequence intubation" I get all thrown off anyways, so we just kept her talking and asking for the 40th time if she had neck pain. I did manage to ask some semi-relevant questions, check her pupils, and take a pulse before the fire truck got there, but they were way more systematic in their approach (and actually had supplies like a BP cuff and a C-collar), which made me glad my first time as the good Samaritan wasn't a life-or-death situation.
She was fine, a poor first-year med student, and former EMT, on her way to class, and not too thrilled at being taken to the ED. But you could see the shock setting in, her jaw shaking from adrenaline and cold when she tried to talk, so I'm glad they took her anyways. Besides some road rash and sore knees, she managed to escape as well as possible. Luckily I had a bike rack on my car and took her bike to campus where she was able to pick it up when she was released. Shoot, even I had some shakiness once the adrenaline wore off. And of course, as I think about how I want to be prepared next time, I'm realizing that first aid kit and CPR mask I bought are nowhere to be found. Rats.
All in all though, it pretty much solidified that even though it will be scary when someone yells, "Is anyone a doctor?" I know that this is exactly what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. (Well, maybe not tending cyclists on the street, but you get the idea)
For a second I hoped that the cyclist somehow swerved, but when I saw the wheel flip up into the air, well, that's when my sympathetic nervous system kicked in. Were I a swearing person, I'm pretty sure a choice word would have escaped my mouth. Instead, my thoughts were, "Well, this is what you're training for, GET OUT OF THE FREAKING CAR!" I was so glad 3 of my classmates also stopped, because it was way less nerve-wracking that way. So I get out of the car and the first thing I do is make sure someone's already got a dispatcher on the phone (I mean, really, the first step is to call for help). So then there's this poor girl just lying sprawled in the road, neighbors in their pajamas saying "Don't move." Meanwhile, "ABCs! ABCs! ABCs!" kept running through my head, but she was talking and breathing just fine, and when the answer isn't "rapid sequence intubation" I get all thrown off anyways, so we just kept her talking and asking for the 40th time if she had neck pain. I did manage to ask some semi-relevant questions, check her pupils, and take a pulse before the fire truck got there, but they were way more systematic in their approach (and actually had supplies like a BP cuff and a C-collar), which made me glad my first time as the good Samaritan wasn't a life-or-death situation.
She was fine, a poor first-year med student, and former EMT, on her way to class, and not too thrilled at being taken to the ED. But you could see the shock setting in, her jaw shaking from adrenaline and cold when she tried to talk, so I'm glad they took her anyways. Besides some road rash and sore knees, she managed to escape as well as possible. Luckily I had a bike rack on my car and took her bike to campus where she was able to pick it up when she was released. Shoot, even I had some shakiness once the adrenaline wore off. And of course, as I think about how I want to be prepared next time, I'm realizing that first aid kit and CPR mask I bought are nowhere to be found. Rats.
All in all though, it pretty much solidified that even though it will be scary when someone yells, "Is anyone a doctor?" I know that this is exactly what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. (Well, maybe not tending cyclists on the street, but you get the idea)
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Yes, I'm writing about Susan Boyle, so sue me
I'll admit it, I love this video. It's a perfect song choice, and fantastically performed. And I hope she goes all the way to the Queen. The following is an excerpt from an article written by Fr. James Martin, SJ, associate editor of America magazine--"Susan Boyle and the Love of God."
The way we see Susan Boyle is very nearly the way God sees us: worthwhile, special, talented, unique, beautiful. The world generally looks askance at people like Susan Boyle, if it sees them at all. Without classic good looks, without work, without a spouse, living in a small town, people like Susan Boyle may not seem particularly "important." But God sees the real person, and understands the value of each individual's gifts: rich or poor, young or old, single or married, matron or movie star, lucky or unlucky in life. God knows us. And loves us.
It's beautiful. And true. Watch the video and tell me you don't see "worthwhile, special, talented, unique, beautiful."
For the full article, click.
The way we see Susan Boyle is very nearly the way God sees us: worthwhile, special, talented, unique, beautiful. The world generally looks askance at people like Susan Boyle, if it sees them at all. Without classic good looks, without work, without a spouse, living in a small town, people like Susan Boyle may not seem particularly "important." But God sees the real person, and understands the value of each individual's gifts: rich or poor, young or old, single or married, matron or movie star, lucky or unlucky in life. God knows us. And loves us.
It's beautiful. And true. Watch the video and tell me you don't see "worthwhile, special, talented, unique, beautiful."
For the full article, click.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Top 5 Top 5 Lists
So this facebook phenomenon of Top 5 lists intrigues me. I can't put my finger on what is so fun about naming the superlatives of random categories, but I think it has something to do with defining ourselves in a concrete way. I mean, we don't really care about anyone else's "Top 5 Shows I Watched With My Dad" but when we think back on our own, it's a way to relive good memories (I mean, if you count Xena, Warrior Princess as a good memory). Anyways, in honor of that, and without any shred of seriousness, I bring you the Top 5 Top 5 Lists, inspired by actual events.
1. Top 5 things you do not want to find in your fridge. The top, BY FAR, on this list would be the multicolored pond found underneath the produce drawers when the freezer stopped working and dripped down into everything. It took 6 of us almost that many hours to clean it out. I can still smell it.
2. Top 5 things you do not want to hear your surgeon say. Let's just say that "Oops", while falling into this category, would not even make the top 5. Not after hearing "What the heck does this do?" "I want to kill somebody, that's what" and "Holy s#@$t" in the OR.
3. Top 5 places NOT to pass out. Not that there are good places to pass out. But in a patient's room or into a microphone in church are definitely ones you should try to avoid if at all possible.
4. Top 5 ways to keep Band-aids in business. I would have to think a bit about the next four, but the first on this list would definitely be cutting my LEFT thumb on my pocket knife while showing everyone how I cut my RIGHT thumb by trying to see how sharp the knife was. Who does that?
5. Top 5 Mary-isms. My family loves teasing Mary for her creativity with the English language. "I'm not a dult." (did you mean you're not an A-dult?) But I think this could include all of those hilarious moments where we didn't quite say what we wanted to say. "Do your ears hang low, do they holler to and fro?" Hahahaha. Because that's a much more enjoyable thing to dwell on, as long as we're all laughing together, than the above categories.
There you have it. As with all Top 5 lists, we think of things we should have added long after the list is published. So it will be with this, I'm almost sure of it. In fact, there could be a whole category of "Top 5 Lists That Laura Has Revised After Completing" but since there's also a fairly extensive "List of Things Laura Can't Remember On Command", I don't know what those are.
Happy List Making.
1. Top 5 things you do not want to find in your fridge. The top, BY FAR, on this list would be the multicolored pond found underneath the produce drawers when the freezer stopped working and dripped down into everything. It took 6 of us almost that many hours to clean it out. I can still smell it.
2. Top 5 things you do not want to hear your surgeon say. Let's just say that "Oops", while falling into this category, would not even make the top 5. Not after hearing "What the heck does this do?" "I want to kill somebody, that's what" and "Holy s#@$t" in the OR.
3. Top 5 places NOT to pass out. Not that there are good places to pass out. But in a patient's room or into a microphone in church are definitely ones you should try to avoid if at all possible.
4. Top 5 ways to keep Band-aids in business. I would have to think a bit about the next four, but the first on this list would definitely be cutting my LEFT thumb on my pocket knife while showing everyone how I cut my RIGHT thumb by trying to see how sharp the knife was. Who does that?
5. Top 5 Mary-isms. My family loves teasing Mary for her creativity with the English language. "I'm not a dult." (did you mean you're not an A-dult?) But I think this could include all of those hilarious moments where we didn't quite say what we wanted to say. "Do your ears hang low, do they holler to and fro?" Hahahaha. Because that's a much more enjoyable thing to dwell on, as long as we're all laughing together, than the above categories.
There you have it. As with all Top 5 lists, we think of things we should have added long after the list is published. So it will be with this, I'm almost sure of it. In fact, there could be a whole category of "Top 5 Lists That Laura Has Revised After Completing" but since there's also a fairly extensive "List of Things Laura Can't Remember On Command", I don't know what those are.
Happy List Making.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
I'm pretty excited....
...that my birthday is coming up. I know it's a little self-centered, but I love the feeling that even if I'm the only one who knows it, it's like my own special day out of the whole year.
...that I didn't have to file 26 tax returns like my mom. Knew there had to be an upside to never making money.
...that Thursday the OR and the clinic are closed. No one knows why. Who cares.
...that grapefruit was on sale on Sunflower and that Dad was buying. You should see me eat them. I'm like a machine. Don't even stop to breathe.
...that I didn't have to file 26 tax returns like my mom. Knew there had to be an upside to never making money.
...that Thursday the OR and the clinic are closed. No one knows why. Who cares.
...that grapefruit was on sale on Sunflower and that Dad was buying. You should see me eat them. I'm like a machine. Don't even stop to breathe.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
He is Risen
Sometimes I am given the grace of perspective to stop and think about what's really important. How, if we are honest with ourselves, we can admit that the only thing that matters is getting closer to God. Kneeling in front of the Eucharist, standing together as a congregation, lifting our voices in prayer, sitting with a friend in need, serving the poor. And I think about getting caught up in everything else. Oil changes and rent payments and health insurance and what I'm going to pack for lunch tomorrow; how early I have to get up and how long I'll be at work and what residency I'll be good enough for and how much money I'll make; when the last time was I talked to whoever and how I haven't worked out in three days, or showered for that matter (no, just kidding, I'm not Mary). It's so hard to put all of that on pause and remember. So, today, when we celebrate the triumph of the Son over death, take some time to remember what matters. Because all of those distractions won't mean a thing when your time comes and He asks you, "Did you love Me with everything you had?" Please help me remember as well. Alleluia.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Play Something Country
Watching the Academy of Country Music Awards...LOVING it! I love that you can tell a story with a song, wear jeans to the awards show, have Jimmy Buffett and Andy Griffith cameos, and talk about God unabashedly. And I think Reba is hilarious.
And there's definitely a ring of fire on stage during "Johnny and June"...that's awesome!
And there's definitely a ring of fire on stage during "Johnny and June"...that's awesome!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Donate Life
I don't have time to rehash this whole crazy week, but here's a modified excerpt from a letter I wrote to a friend about my time on Transplant Surgery.
We had no actual transplants scheduled for the week, so it was shaping up to be a kind of slow week, with a couple of minor surgeries to address complications of past transplants. Then on Thursday morning, with a huge snowstorm brewing, we got a call that there was a donor over at a hospital across town. Around 11:30, the Donor Alliance picked us up in their black Expedition, with a driver who looked straight out of Secret Service (sunglasses, suit, rarely spoke, said "Sir" and opened the doors for us), and lunch waiting for us in the car (since we wouldn’t otherwise have time to eat). We drove over to the hospital and the donor was all ready when we got there: prepped, draped, only his torso showing underneath all the blue sterile drapes, with a huge tattoo covering his whole chest and stomach. It’s a bizarre surgery, because his heart is beating and he is breathing on a ventilator, even though he’s “dead” and the anesthesiologist is managing him fairly aggressively in order to get high enough blood pressures not to damage the organs. They cut him open from sternum to pelvis, crack the ribs, and get everything ready to take the organs out. On the surgeon’s signal, the aorta gets clamped, the main vein back to the heart gets cut, the ice gets poured into the abdominal cavity, and they start cutting the arteries to the liver and kidneys. Then the anesthesiologist leaves, because the patient is no longer alive. It was a very humbling and surreal surgery to watch the heart actually stop beating and to go from essentially an alive patient to an almost empty body cavity. But there's a certain amount of necessary detachment to do it. We took the liver and both kidneys back to the University Hospital for transplant (the roads were horrible because of the snow, and we were an hour and a half late getting back) and they took the heart and one lung for research. Once we got back, everything was in full swing. Our liver recipient was already in the hospital, because of hip pain, so they took her back to the operating room, and the surgery was about 7 hours overall. She bled a lot and we had to give her about 7 liters of blood and almost 7 liters of plasma back during the surgery, but the liver started working right away, and she was doing great. I got about 4 hours of sleep that night and then was back the next morning to transplant the two kidneys. Both patients also did really well. It’s a less traumatic surgery because they leave both native kidneys in the body and just put the transplant down by the bladder and connect it up to the blood vessels. It was incredible to see these organs come out of the ice bath, and as soon as you connect blood flow to them, they start working again, in a brand new body. Three lives were totally changed by this one donor. So, exhausted, but a very cool week.
Tell your loved ones you want to be a donor.
We had no actual transplants scheduled for the week, so it was shaping up to be a kind of slow week, with a couple of minor surgeries to address complications of past transplants. Then on Thursday morning, with a huge snowstorm brewing, we got a call that there was a donor over at a hospital across town. Around 11:30, the Donor Alliance picked us up in their black Expedition, with a driver who looked straight out of Secret Service (sunglasses, suit, rarely spoke, said "Sir" and opened the doors for us), and lunch waiting for us in the car (since we wouldn’t otherwise have time to eat). We drove over to the hospital and the donor was all ready when we got there: prepped, draped, only his torso showing underneath all the blue sterile drapes, with a huge tattoo covering his whole chest and stomach. It’s a bizarre surgery, because his heart is beating and he is breathing on a ventilator, even though he’s “dead” and the anesthesiologist is managing him fairly aggressively in order to get high enough blood pressures not to damage the organs. They cut him open from sternum to pelvis, crack the ribs, and get everything ready to take the organs out. On the surgeon’s signal, the aorta gets clamped, the main vein back to the heart gets cut, the ice gets poured into the abdominal cavity, and they start cutting the arteries to the liver and kidneys. Then the anesthesiologist leaves, because the patient is no longer alive. It was a very humbling and surreal surgery to watch the heart actually stop beating and to go from essentially an alive patient to an almost empty body cavity. But there's a certain amount of necessary detachment to do it. We took the liver and both kidneys back to the University Hospital for transplant (the roads were horrible because of the snow, and we were an hour and a half late getting back) and they took the heart and one lung for research. Once we got back, everything was in full swing. Our liver recipient was already in the hospital, because of hip pain, so they took her back to the operating room, and the surgery was about 7 hours overall. She bled a lot and we had to give her about 7 liters of blood and almost 7 liters of plasma back during the surgery, but the liver started working right away, and she was doing great. I got about 4 hours of sleep that night and then was back the next morning to transplant the two kidneys. Both patients also did really well. It’s a less traumatic surgery because they leave both native kidneys in the body and just put the transplant down by the bladder and connect it up to the blood vessels. It was incredible to see these organs come out of the ice bath, and as soon as you connect blood flow to them, they start working again, in a brand new body. Three lives were totally changed by this one donor. So, exhausted, but a very cool week.
Tell your loved ones you want to be a donor.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
This will only sting for a second
Once again I find myself doing many things that I don't feel I've been properly trained to do. Today I placed 3 IV's, did 2 intubations (one unsuccessfully, but who cares), and one laryngeal mask airway. At this point, I've done everything to put the patient to sleep but actually push the "party juice" and really, anyone can do that, it's just that you need a medical license to get it from the pharmacy. I've also seen some incredible things in the OR, like the blood bath of a hip replacement and a heart beating from a cracked-open chest during bypass. How cool is my job?
That brings me to one more day of my (too short) anesthesia rotation and I find myself at an uncomfortable crossroads. Here's the problem: I really like it. Huh? Okay, so I was all set on a career in pediatrics from Day 1, and nothing has been able to sway me from that. Until now. I wouldn't even call it a full sway, more like a persistent nudge. But it's tempting. Great hours, great pay, great colleagues. More procedures, lots of in-your-face cause-and-effect, staying on your toes, shouting "Mr. Simon, WAKE UP!" I'll have to do some serious thinking about throwing an anesthesia rotation into early 4th year if I'm going to figure this out. Pray for me. I'll need it.
That brings me to one more day of my (too short) anesthesia rotation and I find myself at an uncomfortable crossroads. Here's the problem: I really like it. Huh? Okay, so I was all set on a career in pediatrics from Day 1, and nothing has been able to sway me from that. Until now. I wouldn't even call it a full sway, more like a persistent nudge. But it's tempting. Great hours, great pay, great colleagues. More procedures, lots of in-your-face cause-and-effect, staying on your toes, shouting "Mr. Simon, WAKE UP!" I'll have to do some serious thinking about throwing an anesthesia rotation into early 4th year if I'm going to figure this out. Pray for me. I'll need it.
Making Headlines
Quite a day for my alma mater athletics. Once again, ABK is looking strong to start the season, the winningest soccer program in the state. And I have to say, Matt Bouldin has come a long way from the 2nd grade, when Michelle and I started an unsuccessful plot to set him up with Mary. Little did we know they would both turn out to be D1 superstars, but not sweethearts.
Warriors' family affair
A bolder Bouldin
Warriors' family affair
A bolder Bouldin
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Bizkit almost made me do the gross laugh
Okay, if you've seen the narcoleptic dog video (if you haven't, YouTube it. NOW!), this is even funnier. I'm not kidding.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
RIP Rocky
Yesterday was the last ever issue of The Rocky Mountain News, the only paper we've ever subscribed to.
Something about the prominent Sunday edition and "traditional" format being the reason why The Rocky died instead of The Post. I'll take the famous "tabloid" format of The Rocky any day. Any day.
I'll also miss the balanced reporting. One day into The Post dynasty, I found nothing but liberal crap littering the pages. Oh, one decent story regarding the pope's excommunication of the Holocaust-never-happened cardinal. I don't know, maybe it's because there's nothing but liberal crap going on in the world right now, but it's not like they had to choose editorials saying the the stimulus package "falls short" in terms of it's unprecedented scope, that reversing Bush's health care provider rights bill is "a great idea", and let's not forget tomorrow's big story about giving illegals in-state tuition...since we have higher education funds coming out of our ears. No thanks.
As I read through the special tribute to the last 150 years of The Rocky, tears came to my eyes, remembering how I was riveted reading their coverage of Columbine, September 11, and a dozen special features over the years (Thunderridge HS, The Final Salute, etc). Not to mention the better puzzles and comics section, which is of course, the main deciding factor in choosing which newspaper you read.
We'll miss you, Rocky. Thanks for being Denver's oldest, and one of the best, businesses.
Something about the prominent Sunday edition and "traditional" format being the reason why The Rocky died instead of The Post. I'll take the famous "tabloid" format of The Rocky any day. Any day.
I'll also miss the balanced reporting. One day into The Post dynasty, I found nothing but liberal crap littering the pages. Oh, one decent story regarding the pope's excommunication of the Holocaust-never-happened cardinal. I don't know, maybe it's because there's nothing but liberal crap going on in the world right now, but it's not like they had to choose editorials saying the the stimulus package "falls short" in terms of it's unprecedented scope, that reversing Bush's health care provider rights bill is "a great idea", and let's not forget tomorrow's big story about giving illegals in-state tuition...since we have higher education funds coming out of our ears. No thanks.
As I read through the special tribute to the last 150 years of The Rocky, tears came to my eyes, remembering how I was riveted reading their coverage of Columbine, September 11, and a dozen special features over the years (Thunderridge HS, The Final Salute, etc). Not to mention the better puzzles and comics section, which is of course, the main deciding factor in choosing which newspaper you read.
We'll miss you, Rocky. Thanks for being Denver's oldest, and one of the best, businesses.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
100
In celebration of the 100th post, I wanted to do something special. Since "The Bucket List" has been circulating Facebook, and since I've wanted to do mine for some time now, I decided to put it to paper. Some of the things I've done or want to do don't seem that significant, but are things I'm either glad I've done or want to be glad I've done. And of course, some of them are pretty big. I am glad that the "done" list is significantly longer than the "to-do"...means I'm not wasting time. Feel free to tell me some of your list as well, or other suggestions.
So without further ado, the first draft...
So without further ado, the first draft...
The Bucket List
See Juan Diego’s tilma in Guadalupe
See the sun shine all day in
Go to
Be kissed under the mistletoe
Go to an NFL game
Go to a WPS game
Go to the Olympics
Own my own dog
Become a doctor
See Phantom of the Opera live
Travel to a Spanish speaking country (Mexican cruise didn’t count)
Order a hot dog (“Coke. Mustard.”) from a street stand
Irish Car Bomb (maybe a mini one)
Save a life
Be a godmother (I know this isn’t really up to me, but it would still be awesome)
Go to
See a European soccer match live
Coach softball
Go to Martinsville Candy Kitchen
Things I've Already Done
Sailing with a pina colada and dolphins
Go snowmobiling
Do overnight backpacking
Been on a cruise
Seen the pope (twice)
Been to
Sung Karaoke (granted, not in the most formal or populated of places)
Traveled by motorcycle
Snorkeled with turtles and sharks
Been to the MLB All-Star Game
Seen an NHL game
Give a wedding toast
Take pictures in a photo booth
Go ice skating on a frozen lake
Climbed Mt Elbert, the tallest mountain in CO
Watched a mountain sunrise and sunset
Hiked in the
Hiked the Sand Dunes
Bought something at an art auction
Seen the USWNT play live
Attended the opera, Handel’s Messiah, the symphony, and a Broadway show
Driven ATVs
Played soccer on the beach
Ridden in a limo (it was blue glitter!)
Go horsebackriding
Took guitar lessons
Driven a jet ski
Tequila shot a la The Cutting Edge
Built a gingerbread house
Helped stitch someone up in surgery
Held an alligator
Fire department ride along
Hoisted my state champion sister on my shoulders
Been hoisted on shoulders after winning a race
Coached a soccer team
Been a confirmation sponsor
Laughed so hard I cried
Ridden a train, a public subway, and the bus
Ridden in a Mustang convertible
Surfed
Won a cow-pie throwing contest!
Been in a parade
Slept under the stars
Many sparrows
I love music. I love what it can make you feel that the same words, even without music, never could.
Peaceful now, go sleep like you are sure that you are loved.
Peaceful now, go sleep like you are sure that you are loved.
Monday, February 16, 2009
God's creations
Sometimes I think part of me does things so that later I can go, "Oh, I went to the park and read some Emily Dickinson, and sketched the children watching the geese." Because doesn't that just sound like how you should spend the day?
Each life converges to some centre
Expressed or still;
Exists in every human nature
A goal,
...Ungained, it may be, by a life's low venture,
But then,
Eternity enables the endeavoring
Again.
I've been wanting to tell you about my patients that I've had for the last 2 weeks. I'm working at "The Ridge", a state facility for developmentally disabled adults that provides group housing, full time staff for living and programming, and health care--that's us. It reminds me of working with the kids with autism for the first time. You just sort of wing it when you walk in the room, and you hit a lot of resistance, but then, a tiny victory comes in the form of a clap or a smile, or finally letting me examine his stomach, even if he is sitting up instead of lying down. And it makes it all worth it. It makes me sad that so many people can't see the beauty in their lives. Not that there isn't also frustration and heartache and disappointment, but the two aren't independent of each other.
On my first day of work at The Ridge, we went to a funeral for a patient who had passed away over the weekend. Of course I didn't know the patient, but I saw the purpose in his life through his brother, who told those gathered that he never held a conversation with his brother in 50-some years, but his brother taught those around him how to love better. It was beautiful.
Each life converges to some centre
Expressed or still;
Exists in every human nature
A goal,
...Ungained, it may be, by a life's low venture,
But then,
Eternity enables the endeavoring
Again.
I've been wanting to tell you about my patients that I've had for the last 2 weeks. I'm working at "The Ridge", a state facility for developmentally disabled adults that provides group housing, full time staff for living and programming, and health care--that's us. It reminds me of working with the kids with autism for the first time. You just sort of wing it when you walk in the room, and you hit a lot of resistance, but then, a tiny victory comes in the form of a clap or a smile, or finally letting me examine his stomach, even if he is sitting up instead of lying down. And it makes it all worth it. It makes me sad that so many people can't see the beauty in their lives. Not that there isn't also frustration and heartache and disappointment, but the two aren't independent of each other.
On my first day of work at The Ridge, we went to a funeral for a patient who had passed away over the weekend. Of course I didn't know the patient, but I saw the purpose in his life through his brother, who told those gathered that he never held a conversation with his brother in 50-some years, but his brother taught those around him how to love better. It was beautiful.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Enjoying every minute of it
Today's one of those days that you just wish you could bottle. Blue skies, clean air, pick up soccer game in the park, and my favorite view of the skyline behind City Park Lake. Yesterday was bottle-able, too. Ice skating on Evergreen Lake, surrounded by mountains, tiny snowflakes falling softly. Oh yeah, and the two wipeouts that have me wincing today. I finished up a great day with a night of "guilty pleasures": brownies, margaritas, and "She's All That" followed by reminiscing about high school teachers which made me laugh so hard my face hurt. Apparently I'm not the only one who picked up "Gear down, big shifter" from Mr. Hatak.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Ahh, home
I can't count the number of times I've smiled in the last 18 hours. Getting to Silverthorne sooner than expected, seeing familiar streets, filling my tires and wiper fluid by myself, Eisenhower Tunnel (which is only Westbound by the way; Eastbound is Johnson Tunnel, completed 6 years later), coming out of the mountains and seeing flat land (and dry roads), blue sky, the skyline, a cyclist on the road, Rueben and his "prancing", Ms. B baking and me licking the bowl, my duck pillow, my alarm clock (instead of my phone alarm), "She's Gonna Hurt Somebody", etc.
I LOVE being home.
I LOVE being home.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Week 2
I've said just enough about Tony Dungee retiring and how much I hate the Chargers for my coworkers to label me as a "fanatic", reading me every headline on their homepages that has anything to do with football (do I care that TO is leaving the Cowboys? no, but he definitely brought it on himself)
I watched the whole first season of "Pushing Daisies" which, granted was only 9 episodes, but it was nine episodes of brilliant-color-deadpan-humor-heart-fluttering fantasy. And it makes me want to eat pie all the time. That, and the fact that I drive by a Village Inn twice every day on the way to and from work.
I visited 3 of our patients in a nursing home, all ladies in their 90s. The one with severe dementia who doesn't talk kind of balanced out the one who answered "how's your ankle doing?" with her life's story. I was there for 2 1/2 hours. The first time my preceptor sent a student to interview Betty, she thought they slacked off and went skiing for the afternoon. Then she realized Betty just loves a captive audience. And I realized that balancing efficiency and good listening isn't one of my strengths.
Speaking of strengths, Millie, the PA, has admitted that we all have different skills, and one of her is the ability to have her throat swabbed for an hour. Too bad the little boy with a negative strep test didn't share that gift.
There's a store downtown called "Fuzziwig's" and walking inside, you are, literally, a kid in a candy store. Combine the Sweet Factory in the mall with Willy Wonka's Factory, and something out of your best dreams (or a "Pushing Daisies" episode) and you get the general idea. I had to go in once just to let it all overtake me, so that the next time I go in, with intent to buy, I don't end up with a wheelbarrow full of sugar.
Phil's home from Kuwait. Welcome home. And continued prayers for all those still serving.
I watched the whole first season of "Pushing Daisies" which, granted was only 9 episodes, but it was nine episodes of brilliant-color-deadpan-humor-heart-fluttering fantasy. And it makes me want to eat pie all the time. That, and the fact that I drive by a Village Inn twice every day on the way to and from work.
I visited 3 of our patients in a nursing home, all ladies in their 90s. The one with severe dementia who doesn't talk kind of balanced out the one who answered "how's your ankle doing?" with her life's story. I was there for 2 1/2 hours. The first time my preceptor sent a student to interview Betty, she thought they slacked off and went skiing for the afternoon. Then she realized Betty just loves a captive audience. And I realized that balancing efficiency and good listening isn't one of my strengths.
Speaking of strengths, Millie, the PA, has admitted that we all have different skills, and one of her is the ability to have her throat swabbed for an hour. Too bad the little boy with a negative strep test didn't share that gift.
There's a store downtown called "Fuzziwig's" and walking inside, you are, literally, a kid in a candy store. Combine the Sweet Factory in the mall with Willy Wonka's Factory, and something out of your best dreams (or a "Pushing Daisies" episode) and you get the general idea. I had to go in once just to let it all overtake me, so that the next time I go in, with intent to buy, I don't end up with a wheelbarrow full of sugar.
Phil's home from Kuwait. Welcome home. And continued prayers for all those still serving.
Backyard
I went out snowshoeing in my "backyard" this morning. I'm poor at judging distances to tell you how big it is, but it reminds me of the fields out at Peace Huts--rolling hills, tall grass, occasional fences--only all covered with at least two feet of snow. Here's what's out there:
a perfect red barn, with an 'x' on the doors and a rooster weather vane, frosted in white
tiny strands of wheat, coated in tiny ice crystals, poking up from beneath the snowy blanket
a dilapidated shed, the roof covered in a foot of snow, making it want to cave in, and the floor covered with a foot of straw
an incredible sparkling field of diamonds, that shimmers as the sun hits it right
a tiny fox, running for cover from the big-footed monster, even though he could outrun me 10 times out of 10
the Two-Bit Ranch, on the other side of the county road, with a wrought-iron sign hanging at the front of the 1/4 mile gravel drive, just like it should be
and a bit closer to the house, a hot tub, perfect for soaking in 101 degree warmth below your chin while the snow falls on your hands and face. it's a striking contrast, exhilerating
a perfect red barn, with an 'x' on the doors and a rooster weather vane, frosted in white
tiny strands of wheat, coated in tiny ice crystals, poking up from beneath the snowy blanket
a dilapidated shed, the roof covered in a foot of snow, making it want to cave in, and the floor covered with a foot of straw
an incredible sparkling field of diamonds, that shimmers as the sun hits it right
a tiny fox, running for cover from the big-footed monster, even though he could outrun me 10 times out of 10
the Two-Bit Ranch, on the other side of the county road, with a wrought-iron sign hanging at the front of the 1/4 mile gravel drive, just like it should be
and a bit closer to the house, a hot tub, perfect for soaking in 101 degree warmth below your chin while the snow falls on your hands and face. it's a striking contrast, exhilerating
Friday, January 9, 2009
What am I doing here?
Here's what I think of Steamboat....I like snow, but not that much snow.
So far, it has been a lot of getting used to things. Things like getting stuck in the driveway and having to be towed out. Things like having my windshield wipers constantly on. Things like not having internet at my house. Or even a tv that I can figure out. Things like wearing snow boots to work. Things like the doctors in the office knowing every detail about their patients and their families.
But I think if you give me this weekend to get out and enjoy myself, I'll find myself much more settled, much more ready to give this my all. Much more ready to face another 3 weeks away from home.
And if anyone wants to come visit, I'll cook for you.
So far, it has been a lot of getting used to things. Things like getting stuck in the driveway and having to be towed out. Things like having my windshield wipers constantly on. Things like not having internet at my house. Or even a tv that I can figure out. Things like wearing snow boots to work. Things like the doctors in the office knowing every detail about their patients and their families.
But I think if you give me this weekend to get out and enjoy myself, I'll find myself much more settled, much more ready to give this my all. Much more ready to face another 3 weeks away from home.
And if anyone wants to come visit, I'll cook for you.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
A New Year
Top moments of 2008 (I couldn't remember anything, so I just scoured my blog, figuring most notable things would be in there):
1. Marian group retreat--my first trip to St. Malo, beautiful weather, sliding around on the frozen pond, hiking the JPII trail, wonderful friends...glorious.
2. WSMRF--a big long acronym that means my first "business" trip to Carmel, CA to present my research at a conference. The actual presentation was terrifying, but I loved sightseeing and shopping and eating out and the beach...and especially that the school paid for it.
3. Getting Step 1 behind me--taking a month to study for my first set of boards was way less stressful than I planned on, and getting it behind me was a huge relief...now on to Step 2.
4. Call me doctor--Michelle's graduation in May. I was so proud to see her up there, and it was the first real reunion of everyone in the 2 years since my Creighton graduation. Translation: tons of laughter!
5. US WNT--holy cow, I love soccer! 2 big highlights this year: the WNT (women's national team) came to Denver to play Brazil in their pre-Beijing send-off tour, and we got fully decked out, made huge signs that made the jumbotron, yelled at HAO, and watched them check off another of their record-setting wins. Then there was the 3 am games of Beijing and wearing my jersey over my pajamas and watching the live broadcast in class, almost falling out of my chair when they scored in OT. Gold, baby!
6. I got to dust off the softball glove for the young adult tournament this year. It's easy to forget how much I miss being on the mound, chatting it up, organizing the defense, cheering every batter, etc. We didn't do too bad, either. Only lost to the eventual first- and second-place teams.
7. Getting into the clinical years--seeing patients is SO much better than sitting in class.
8. Babies!!! I got to deliver babies and see many of my friends and cousins bring home babies of their own. I love babies!
9. Chuck--hard to believe that I've only been watching for a matter of months, but seriously, this has been a highlight of the year. I LOVE watching Chuck!
10. Christmas--two weeks of no school, walks on the beach, and my crazy family. Fun times.
A look forward...I wish I had taken the time to think of New Year's Resolutions, but for now, we'll settle for seeing what's in store for this year:
1. More school--finishing up with family medicine and surgery, and then all of my sub-internships and electives, not to mention studying for Step 2, applying for residency, and interviewing around the country. Lots of prayers, please.
2. Chi-town--there are 5 sites around the country to take the Step 2 CS exam. I'm taking a weekend in Chicago, hopefully with Hilary and complete with a Cubs game (and a Red Stars game?...see #3)
3. WPS--women's pro soccer is back, with the WPS debuting. I'm hoping to make it to one game this year and hopefully more next year.
4. Weddings and babies--so far, I have 2 cousins and a good friend set to take the plunge (I think I'll only make it to the friend's though) and probably more to come. And 2 pregnant cousins, and again, probably more to come. Yay!
That's all I know for now...thanks for taking a look back and a look forward with me. Many blessings in the new year.
1. Marian group retreat--my first trip to St. Malo, beautiful weather, sliding around on the frozen pond, hiking the JPII trail, wonderful friends...glorious.
2. WSMRF--a big long acronym that means my first "business" trip to Carmel, CA to present my research at a conference. The actual presentation was terrifying, but I loved sightseeing and shopping and eating out and the beach...and especially that the school paid for it.
3. Getting Step 1 behind me--taking a month to study for my first set of boards was way less stressful than I planned on, and getting it behind me was a huge relief...now on to Step 2.
4. Call me doctor--Michelle's graduation in May. I was so proud to see her up there, and it was the first real reunion of everyone in the 2 years since my Creighton graduation. Translation: tons of laughter!
5. US WNT--holy cow, I love soccer! 2 big highlights this year: the WNT (women's national team) came to Denver to play Brazil in their pre-Beijing send-off tour, and we got fully decked out, made huge signs that made the jumbotron, yelled at HAO, and watched them check off another of their record-setting wins. Then there was the 3 am games of Beijing and wearing my jersey over my pajamas and watching the live broadcast in class, almost falling out of my chair when they scored in OT. Gold, baby!
6. I got to dust off the softball glove for the young adult tournament this year. It's easy to forget how much I miss being on the mound, chatting it up, organizing the defense, cheering every batter, etc. We didn't do too bad, either. Only lost to the eventual first- and second-place teams.
7. Getting into the clinical years--seeing patients is SO much better than sitting in class.
8. Babies!!! I got to deliver babies and see many of my friends and cousins bring home babies of their own. I love babies!
9. Chuck--hard to believe that I've only been watching for a matter of months, but seriously, this has been a highlight of the year. I LOVE watching Chuck!
10. Christmas--two weeks of no school, walks on the beach, and my crazy family. Fun times.
A look forward...I wish I had taken the time to think of New Year's Resolutions, but for now, we'll settle for seeing what's in store for this year:
1. More school--finishing up with family medicine and surgery, and then all of my sub-internships and electives, not to mention studying for Step 2, applying for residency, and interviewing around the country. Lots of prayers, please.
2. Chi-town--there are 5 sites around the country to take the Step 2 CS exam. I'm taking a weekend in Chicago, hopefully with Hilary and complete with a Cubs game (and a Red Stars game?...see #3)
3. WPS--women's pro soccer is back, with the WPS debuting. I'm hoping to make it to one game this year and hopefully more next year.
4. Weddings and babies--so far, I have 2 cousins and a good friend set to take the plunge (I think I'll only make it to the friend's though) and probably more to come. And 2 pregnant cousins, and again, probably more to come. Yay!
That's all I know for now...thanks for taking a look back and a look forward with me. Many blessings in the new year.
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