So this facebook phenomenon of Top 5 lists intrigues me. I can't put my finger on what is so fun about naming the superlatives of random categories, but I think it has something to do with defining ourselves in a concrete way. I mean, we don't really care about anyone else's "Top 5 Shows I Watched With My Dad" but when we think back on our own, it's a way to relive good memories (I mean, if you count Xena, Warrior Princess as a good memory). Anyways, in honor of that, and without any shred of seriousness, I bring you the Top 5 Top 5 Lists, inspired by actual events.
1. Top 5 things you do not want to find in your fridge. The top, BY FAR, on this list would be the multicolored pond found underneath the produce drawers when the freezer stopped working and dripped down into everything. It took 6 of us almost that many hours to clean it out. I can still smell it.
2. Top 5 things you do not want to hear your surgeon say. Let's just say that "Oops", while falling into this category, would not even make the top 5. Not after hearing "What the heck does this do?" "I want to kill somebody, that's what" and "Holy s#@$t" in the OR.
3. Top 5 places NOT to pass out. Not that there are good places to pass out. But in a patient's room or into a microphone in church are definitely ones you should try to avoid if at all possible.
4. Top 5 ways to keep Band-aids in business. I would have to think a bit about the next four, but the first on this list would definitely be cutting my LEFT thumb on my pocket knife while showing everyone how I cut my RIGHT thumb by trying to see how sharp the knife was. Who does that?
5. Top 5 Mary-isms. My family loves teasing Mary for her creativity with the English language. "I'm not a dult." (did you mean you're not an A-dult?) But I think this could include all of those hilarious moments where we didn't quite say what we wanted to say. "Do your ears hang low, do they holler to and fro?" Hahahaha. Because that's a much more enjoyable thing to dwell on, as long as we're all laughing together, than the above categories.
There you have it. As with all Top 5 lists, we think of things we should have added long after the list is published. So it will be with this, I'm almost sure of it. In fact, there could be a whole category of "Top 5 Lists That Laura Has Revised After Completing" but since there's also a fairly extensive "List of Things Laura Can't Remember On Command", I don't know what those are.
Happy List Making.
1 comment:
I'm sitting here between two pharmacists in the central pharmacy (two pharmacists who by the way have said about 5 words to me all day), trying not to laugh out loud at your list. And boy, do I ever want to constantly revise my lists. If facebook weren't officially banned from the pharmacy department, that's what I'd spend my dinner break doing.
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